Over affectionate (to other people) 5 year old
9 answers /
Last post: 10/04/2023 at 2:54 pm
I have posted on here before about my son being very energetic, I found that artificial colours in foods can make the problem a lot worse so these have been cut out of his diet completely.
He is still energetic but Ive accepted this & feel he is just a typical energetic boy. Trying to channel this into football & athletics in the new year.
Thing is he has always been affectionate to EVERYBODY, he tries to kiss all of his friends, & while it may be seen as "sweet" some of them, especially the boys, dont want to be kissed & my lo is quite insistant on doing so!
I have told him to ask first & he does for the next couple of times, but then forgets!
We went to a party yesterday & I always stay as I know what he is like! He was kissing most of the parents & at one point I had to take him off to one side & tell him to stop as some people were uncomfortable with it.
He is very outgoing & not shy at all but has funny little ways, he is bright & his language is very good, its just he is very strong willed & doesnt seem to listen to me about the whole kissing thing! lol
Karen xxx
Good luck with it all, take care love Lynne x
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thanks for your replies, Victoria-I have thought about drama classes before, but only because he is so confident & out-going, they are a bit too pricey for me at the moment & although we do live in a Sure Start area, he is 5 in January so probably wouldnt qualify.
Lynne-interesting to find out that someone elses child does similar things, all the other kids I know are the other way-shy, but my lo is def not that! lol
What other needs does your daughter have? - hope you dont mind me asking
Karen xxx
My youngest son when he started playgroup and then onto the school nursery - always wanted to kiss everyone goodbye.I realised at the time it was just because thats what we "did".We expected him and his elder brother to kiss hello and goodbye to nanny,grandad,aunts,uncles,mummy and daddy.I realise he was finding it hard as where do you draw the line?! We managed with immediate family's help to talk about kissing - that it was only for mummies/daddies and nannies and grandads.We actually explained to other members of the family that we won't be doing kissing goodbye...............just waving from now on! It seemed to sink in pretty quickly.He actually loved it when my uncle told him that "real men" shake hands - so he loved going round shaking hands with everyone!
No offence but do you think its an attention thing for you? How do react when he does it? Do you go over immediately....pull him off.........apologise.........get a bit flustered about it?I personally wouldn't mind any 5 yr old coming up to me ( i know some people are awkward you say) and I'd probably have a laugh with his mum about it.I would maybe try and go down that route............as much as you can bear it........let him carry on and maybe if you fel you have to comment just say Bless Him or something! As for the other kids liking or disliking it...............I'd let them sort it out....uf they don't like it,they'll soon tell him and he'll learn eventually.
Yes it is a hard one, I agree!
I dont think its an attention thing as I dont step in unless it looks like the adult looks uncomfortable, I usually let him get on with it if its a child as they soon make their feelings known! (Unless my lo looks like he is getting a bit forceful, as he sometimes does)
It happens at school as the teachers have explained to me that he does try & kiss them but they arent allowed to so they blow kisses.
I have spoken to him about asking first & also that some boys dont like to be kissed but it goes in one ear & out of the other, maybe he will grow out of it, who knows?!
Karen xxx
Hello Karen, I'm not sure you will see this has I'm coming across this thread 16 years later! Thought it was worth a try though because your son back then sounds exactly the same as my son now, who is 5 and a half. Was curious to find out how this changed as your son got older and what he is like now! It's possible my son is on the autistic spectrum as well as having ADHD although nothing has been diagnosed yet (on waiting list). He is extremely intelligent but seems to lack boundaries in some areas (like this one you are describing). It's possible a boy is picking on him at school and am wondering if he is using this over affection as a method of trying to feel safe. It is getting to the point now though that other people are bringing it to my attention, like the teachers, who he also kisses, usually their hands! He tells everyone he loves them, or more specifically every girl and woman. Hope you read this even though its a long shot! Carly xx
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