Life falling apart is making ill

Hi Natalia,

I’m Kayleigh, one of the parent supporters at Netmums. Sending you a hug, after all that has happened you no longer want to live with your husband and you want to find out if it’s possible for him to move into another council residence. You are right that because this is a joint tenancy, your husband does have an equal right to be in the home. You would have to make an agreement about who the tenancy will be transferred to if you do decide to end your joint tenancy. Although your husband can apply to be rehomed, because he has available accommodation it is possible they could class him as being intentionally homeless and unfortunately this would mean they would not offer further accommodation.

I would encourage you to contact Citizen’s Advice for further guidance on this - they have some information about housing issues after separation here https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/if-you-were-living-together/what-happens-to-your-home-when-you-separate/ and you can contact them here https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/about-us/contact-us/contact-us/contact-us/

You mentioned that ‘ just thinking he is allow to leave and get into someone else’s bed for weeks and then move back in is making me ill.’ I hear how heavily this is weighing on you Natalia, are you noticing the stress of this situation is leaving you feeling physically unwell?

It sounds like you really need some support right now. Do others in your life know what is going on at the moment? You don't deserve to face this alone.

You could also consider reaching out to your GP for support with your mental health as you navigate all of this

Take care,

Kayleigh

Hi Kayleigh,

thank you for the information and kind support.

Natalia

Ugh some of these men. You need to tell the council asap he moved out and when. If he is still on your tenancy your rent won't have been changed to single adult household.

Then when he decides to come back it's not his house anymore he moved out!

If you have any problems with the council accepting this then call women's aid who can help. He definitely doesn't have to come back and live with you!

Hi Amy,

thank you for this.

now that the other woman has left he has come back.

do you think I can still get in touch with women aid?

I told him I did not want him back but he is disabled and does not work.

he said he was going to speak to CAB and she what his options were but I know what they will say to him so I am stuck with him.

what can I do. I am feeling physically sick

Hi Natalie,

Kayleigh again from the parent support team. I’m sorry to hear how stuck you are feeling in all of this and how it is impacting your health. Women’s Aid have a live chat option if you would like to get in touch: https://chat.womensaid.org.uk/

I hope that CAB are able to give you some further advice too. Do keep in touch with us here if this is helpful for you, we are listening if you would like some further support

Take care,

Kayleigh

Yes call women's aid. They will support you and give you all your options. They will even be your voice. They are worth their weight in gold. You do not have to live with him